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I recently started connecting with old junior high school and high school friends through social networking websites. From the moment I click, "Friend Request" or "Add As Friend" (depending on what site you are on) I clearly start wondering about what kind of life they lead now, are they married, have kids, what type of work do they do now? But more deeper than that, other questions fill my mind, are they still that bubbly and cheerful person I grew so fond of, are they still that introvert, has life changed their personality in any way? But my first question when I glance at their photo on their profile page is, would they really be interested in re-connecting again?
The Facebook newbie that I am, I decided to go through the list of high school alumni of Class of '96 and click, "Add As a Friend" to those that I really wanted to network and connect with in the present. That's when I saw my childhood best friend whom I first met 20 years ago. It was comforting when I got a notification, "Naiomi Pitre has confirmed you as friend". We quickly caught up on each other's personal life. We finally decided to meet for lunch when she returned to back in town to visit her family for the holidays.
I agreed to pick her up so we could have time to chat in the car on the drive to the restaurant since we were also meeting an old junior high school teacher there as well. Upon meeting Naiomi at her mother's house, we greeted each other with a hug. The first words she told me, "Girl, you look exactly the same!" I thought about those words and wondered if I was still the same person as I was 20 years ago, a naive teenager trying to find a certain "crowd" to fit in. Of course I had grown and learned from the hardships that life threw my way, I doubt I was still that naive teen. Thankfully the worries of teenage-acceptance had escaped me after high school graduation.
We discussed many things and laughed on our way to the restaurant. When we arrived there we were greeted by her Jr. High School Earth Science teacher. As we sat over Asian Grilled Salmon bowls, we laughed, cried, and each one of us took turns telling our story. I learned that each one of us, after twenty years still possessed the same core being, the same attitude, the same demeanor, while joyful and tragic events had changed us, we realized & quickly recognized the familiar qualities that befriended us in the beginning. I was inspired by my delightful company that afternoon. I took great comfort in knowing that my close friend was still my friend after so many years. She was still the same person, if not better, that I grew so fond of back then. At that moment, I became puzzled at how we lost our connection right before graduation. After spending 5 hours reliving our memories, we parted ways and said that we would never lose contact. This was the epitome of friendship.
It's clear to me now how friendships develop. We find someone we can relate to, someone who is like us with similar thoughts and visions. We are naturally drawn to the people or things that are a reflection of our inner world within.
“We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we are.”~ Anais Nin