John Kitsco

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Hello Old Timer:
George - I was not sure of how much postage to put on this letter
to Heaven (that is where you are George?) so putting your letter on my blog. Hopefully it'll reach you (by some miracle).  I just
read your book called Dear George (advice and answers from
America's leading expert on everything from A - B) Thats odd
George, only A - B? And George, I should tell you, I have a bone
to pick with you. Everytime you lit your cigar on television I would cough! Now, why couldn't you have played the violin like
Jack Benny? And also, I notice it took you 89 years to write your book. Did you really type that slow? And I have a further axe to grind with you. You said you liked redheads as well as blondes. Well, what about the dark (black or brown hair - or gray hair? )And my apology for not sending you a birthday card. Those things are expensive! But I thought about you, see - my heart is in the right place. And, I did notice some of your pals wrote to you (in your book) - those include Red Buttons, Walter
Matthau, Milton Berle, to name a few.But all in all, your book has been helpful. I have used it as a paper weight. And bought it for only 25 cents at a garage sale. You know George, some of your advice in the book is funny. Was that your intention for the book to be funny?  A reader wrote in: "Dear George, we're a married couple considering starting a family. How far apart do you think children should be spaced? signed, Dear Anxious." To
which you reply: "Dear Anxious - about 5 miles?"  Now that was
pretty brief. Did you ever think that answer was good enough George?  But what do I know. You were the expert, you had the answers. Darn, I am still trying to figure out the questions.

But got to go now George. Say hi to Gracie. And do you think I'll get any royalties for promoting your book? Never mind. We all
love you, all of us down here on earth.