Choices...

Anne Frank was persecuted for her religion, in a time of war when people were at their worst and yet she still said: ‘In spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart.’ One woman who saw such atrocities still had the power of faith in humankind to believe that everyone is essentially good. I was brought up to live my life in the same way; that regardless of someone’s bad actions or misdeeds, they are essentially good inside.

However, at times our beliefs are tested and what we always deemed the backbone to our beliefs may be broken or shattered as we try to understand people, actions and circumstances. The reality is; good and bad are seen in different ways. Whereas some of us may see a smile to a stranger as an act of kindness, others may deem it insulting – why are you greeting someone you do not know? Some view doing nothing when you see an injustice done, doing the right things, whereas others believe in Mandela’s words: ‘All that is necessary to triumph is for good men to do nothing.’

These differences cause rifts, and because humans are not good at trying to understand one another, we often drift apart. I was once told that to understand someone you must walk 1000 miles in their shoes – this is true. Many people judge others far too quickly, or because they do not understand start problems. In trying to understand each other we must not turn on one another, but instead listen to each other.

Until recently, I had never met people who would ‘attack’ you when they did not understand something you had done. Instead of asking, or communicating their mis-understanding, they chose to react in a negative manner. Some reacting only when they couldn’t be seen by others, some reacting constantly. Instead of sitting down and thinking about their actions, the impact of what they were doing (part-time or full-time), they chose to destroy a human being. With age should come wisdom, but wisdom is actually only accessible to those who want to grow as a person. The older you come, the better you can ‘attack’ without being seen and better you can destroy others, but the older you become does not mean you are right.

We all have choices: we all have the choice to do what is right, but we don’t all choose it. Some cannot even see it. Some refuse to even make a choice and bury their head in the sand. Some will purposefully do the wrong thing. Some is not ‘I’. We only have power over our own actions – we cannot judge someone else for their wrong-doing; that judgement lies with one person. We cannot help others make their decision; that decision is for them to make. We can only make the decision that is right for us, in that moment, at that time. As long as we do not hurt others, then the decision is right.

Remember that what we do now will last a life-time: one person can make a positive impact on the lives of many. Whatever choice or decision we make, never look back and regret; look back and smile at what you have learned. We all owe it to ourselves to be the best we can be…