John Kitsco

If you liked this post, check out more from John Kitsco.
There I was, pushing and pulling and trying to get that back door closed before
we left for the hospital.... Finally getting it unstuck away we drove...

Mom is 91 and just had part of one leg amputated, just below the knee. The
cause was an infection  and possibly some poor circulation.  Our recent visit
with her left me feeling sad, somewhat lonesome and empty. Perhaps we all
live on borrowed time and of interest, Moms favorite saying has always been:
Live one day at a time.  Still in spite of her strong will and positive atitude, I
had to ask myself: Is it ok for a grown man to cry?

Well, looking at Mom in her condition, the smile not as bright, the words
not as sharp left me briefly (in my thoughts)  going back to a boy of seven,
picking berries with my brother, two sisters, Mom and Dad. And although
this boy is now a man, the memories are etched in that book of family history,
clear as a rainbow after the rain. And all family members are aware of this
being a sensitive time. Coping and dealing with the healing is a challenge
for all us grown up kids. But our love and our hearts march into the hospital
for the daily ritual of saying: Hi Mom, How are you?

On Saturday Mom said, in almost a whisper as she motioned for me to look
out the window....enjoy the beautiful autumn John.  Enjoy....

And there was that little boy again looking at Mom with teary eyes and
pounding heart, praying quietly to myself: Oh Lord, give her more time. Give
her more time.... Mom oh how we love you. Damn the missing leg or portion
thereof - We LOVE you.

And the lights changed, traffic moved and somehow our car moved along
with everyone else, going about business, finishing another days work, going
about our life.  But back in Room 28 there is Mom, in the twilight of her years,
our Mom, living out life the best she can and at least surrounded by family
and memories of the precious things we so take for granted. God willing she
WILL make it to 100 or more.

And back home, I sanded the top of the back door which until now
refused to easily open or close. And why did I wait so long to do that?