Agh, the Should’s How much of your precious life time are you spending with people that there is a should attached to? They call and you can feel yourself recoiling at the thought of getting together. Neither of you enjoys it, but guess what, you really “should” do it any way. You are good at coming up with a quick excuse for today, but it is getting increasingly harder to dodge them. Undoubtedly there is a very good reason you are not enjoying their company, most likely they are a relative. There are times in life when one has to really be honest with themselves and another. When time spend with someone isn’t enjoyable for either party you are best not to do it just because you think you should. Friendships are for enjoyment, support, and wishing those we care about the best in what ever they are doing in their lives. Most times these relationship are not at all in that category. We come away from them feeling icky, false, and spend a good part of the rest of the day pondering how awful it was. Since our thoughts are really such a very important part of our creation process all we are doing is bringing bad things to ourselves by interacting in these types of relationships. Yes, they do tell us something about ourselves because if something wasn’t active in us that matched something in them the meeting would not be taking place. Feelings like, blame, guilt, and feeling inferior are just a few of the emotions that get made active when we interact with those who don’t have our best interest at heart. There is another possibility that one of the biggest lessons you are being brought is self honoring. Not that the other person is wrong and you are right, but maybe together you don’t make the best companions. To advance in life and be your best you must feel your best. That means surrounding yourself with those who feel good for you to be with. So many times people wallow in relationships that need to end. In order for the new to come in we need to make room. By moving away from relationships that are not honoring and life giving we can free up our energy and time for those that are. Many people are not comfortable with this, they feel like a bad person for ending a stale friendship, what they don’t realize is that by them choosing to move away it gives the other person a chance to examine how they are moving in their life. Unless someone withdraws they may never take the time to do that. It can be one of the most life changing events a person can have. There will be some who are angry or blame you, but there will also be some who recognize their roll in the failed relationship and choose differently in the future. So take stock of where your time is being best spent and spend it there. It is an investment that you will be happy you made.